Jun 05 2009
ICC World Twenty20: New Meerkat bat set to pulp Mongoose into extinction
The new Mongoose cricket bat, currently under experimentation in the domestic Twenty20 tournament, is set to face some strong competition from a new entry to the fray: the Meerkat.
Yack Products’s newest addition to the range of bats available for the modern cricketer offers a “completely new concept set to revolutionise batting as we know it”. Whereas the Mongoose eradicates the bat’s splice, effectively removing ‘dead wood’ from around the blade’s shoulders, the Meerkat offers the polar opposite: a bat made completely from edges.
In a tight situation, the unpredictability of edges tips the scales in the batsman’s favour. We are offering players the chance to fully capitalise on this relatively untapped source of runs with the 100% edge Meerkat bat. — Yack Products Spokesman
Six players have already signed up to use the bat in club cricket in Hindley, and are achieving strike rates of up to 250%*. Studies have shown that the bat is almost impossible control, predict or even hold, making it the perfect blade for Twenty20 cricket.
~ ~ ~ ~
* Research based on a three-ball innings played by one player in one match against a team of over-65s.
* Retro Yakking does not endorse the Meerkat bat or any other crazy Yack product. Any success experienced with the Meerkat bat is by complete fluke, and you would have to be a complete idiot to purchase one.
~ ~ ~ ~
The Twenty20 World Cup gets underway this evening as England play the Netherlands at Lord’s. The final will take place at the same venue on 21st June in two-and-a-bit weeks.
Having only seen cricket on the radio and blog posts on the Ted Steven’s system of inner tubes, I am still unclear why members of the weasel family are employed by a bunch of poofters in white clothing stumbling over what appear to be prehistoric croquet gates.
I can understand hating locusts enough to set trained rodents on them, but crickets make good bait for bream and pumpkinseeds. No need to waste them, particularly during the green revolution.
You Brits sure have strange tastes in spectator sports, but I guess, as reCAPTCHA puts it, we are all intricate alive.
And not all that intricate dead.