Retro Yakking

OH NO! What happened to my BBC2?! Agh! — You

Thanks to an extended period of investigation, or at least fiddling around with the buttons on my Freeview remote control, I have been able to ascertain exactly which methods will be most effective in the battle against the digital switchover. More specifically, I’ve produced this handy step-by-step guide to retuning your digital set top box especially for those of you still struggling to figure out what’s going on.

Before we start, you really should read this informational post from last month. Though it refers to the previous retune on 1st October, many tips still apply to the current situation.

Still perplexed? Follow these simple instructions and don’t sweat it so much. Continue Reading »

If you’re still confused over the whole 30th September retuning of your Freeview box thing, then fear not, for Retro Yakking is here to help.

Yes, the very site that brought you the complete guide to the digital switchover is on the case once again to ensure not a soul is left behind in the digital revolution.

As we mentioned yesterday, the powers that be are rolling out a nationwide update of the Freeview format, encompassing Freesat, NTL and other such free-to-view television receivers. This is essential in upgrading Freeview to High Definition, an ongoing process that will likely take a while, but nonetheless be upon us later rather than sooner.

So we’re assured that it’s for the greater good of the nation, and we shall give them the benefit of the doubt on that. In the short term, however, there are likely to be some problems: here is a brief run down of some of the most common and how they can be easily fixed in minutes.

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Forget Top Gear, with its costly supercar roadtests and exotic location filming - this is real life. In the real world, we cannot afford such luxuries as expensive cars, or even televisions.

Here at Retro Yakking we like to think ourselves in touch with the average man who works very hard for little money. He wants to pee every penny of it up the wall of a weekend, so it goes without saying that his budget for a car falls ever so slightly short of the price of a Bugatti Veyron.

The supermarket trolley is an ideal solution, suiting the common man perfectly with its price tag of £0. When combined with a long stick (or maybe two if you’re slightly more upmarket) to act as a braking system, the shopping trolley is also a reliable, quick and economical choice for the discerning idiot.

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Later today, motor racing’s oldest test of endurance will crown its 77th victorious crew at the climax of the 2009 24 Hours of Le Mans.

Considered the biggest challenge of them all, it is a test of skill, mental toughness and coffee consumption, and secondarily the ability to not steer your car into a wall, tree or vending machine.

Established drivers endure months of rigorous training in order to prepare for the big event, which, common consensus suggests, is not exactly a walk in the park. Or is it?

It doesn’t have to be this way. There are measures one can take that will allow regular Joes to step into the car on race day and emerge victorious 24 hours later, 2,000 Euros richer (hey, that’s a lot after conversion to real currency).

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Ahh, fish fingers - the staple diet of millions of families nationwide. Made from pure factory floor sweepings, they have been malnourishing the residents of our humble isles with their meaty dirt chunks and dried chewing gum filling since the 1940s.

With the Credit Crunch biting the hardest it has ever bitten, the country is turning to the cheap as chips British battered delicacy that goes well with anything. And I mean anything. Why not try them with shoe leather for a delightful appetiser?

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